It happens to me too.

Gentle Reader,

I know that many of your associates or even yourself have suffered indignities because of the choice to be veiled. Given the rise of acceptance for the attitudes of xenophobia, Islamophobia, and fear of anything that looks remotely Arab through those highly skewed viewpoints, there has been a sharp uptick in incidents where people who choose to be veiled are harassed. Sometimes it is the store manager following you around the store as you make your purchases. Sometimes it is the people you walk by at the park muttering something vile and degrading. There's even been incidents where someone has attempted to pull a veil off of a person's head because of their frothing hatred of anything different.

I just want to say that you are not alone. I have had people mutter behind me at the grocery store that I should go back to where I came from. (Honestly, I have been tempted to turn around and say, "I'll be doing that as soon as I get my ham and the rest of my groceries. I live right around the corner." I don't because I don't want there to be a scene.)  I have had people tell me that I was oppressing myself in wearing my veil (which makes absolutely no sense to me). I have also had people move well within my personal space and try to loom over me.

The incident that bothered me so much that it was hard to function for the rest of the day happened yesterday afternoon. I was at the grocery store. I was wearing a sparkly pashmina in a headrail style. Honestly, with how cold it has been, I was thinking about a face veiling style just to be warmer. Looking back, I sadly say that I am glad I didn't.

As I was on my way into the grocery store, a group of young adults (I think they were around 20 and there was five of them.) said "Let's mess with the weird lady in front of us." I would have paid it no mind except for the fact that I was literally the only person in front of them at that time. They followed me around the store for a bit. I managed to dodge them towards the back of the store.

When I finished my shopping and I came out to my car, I found that it was half surrounded by shopping carts. This was not some one just left their cart in the parking lot rather than move it to the cart corral or the front doors because it was so cold it made my feet look tropically warm. It was clear they were placed there deliberately. I suspect the car would have been completely surrounded if they had not been interrupted by someone. It was very upsetting for me. I was having a hard time feeling safe after they stalked me through half the store. Coming out to find that someone deliberately attempted to block my car in with shopping carts was distressing.

I honestly don't know what would have happened if I came out while they were playing their 'prank'. I genuinely felt like my safety was at risk when they were following me. But because I didn't get a good look at them, I couldn't go to staff at the store and inform them that I was being harassed and request the store manager resolve the problem. I feel like if I was wearing a more 'Islamic' style of veil, the threat of physical danger to my person would have been greater. This causes me deep grief and anger.

It also has me feeling like I should carry a roll of quarters in my pocket like I did ages ago when I was dealing with the potential threat of being jumped on a semi-regular basis. Because throwing a punch is more effective with more mass behind it. Just remember, keep your thumb on the outside of the fist. Sensei said if it was on the inside, you'd break your thumb. And keep your hand square with your wrist, so you don't break that either.