Thoughts, lessons, and theology from an eclectic witch from a varied background.

Friday, March 31, 2017

Recommendations: Pampering Yourself.

If your life has been chaotic and stressful, it may be hard to take a breather and just do some self care. Now, some self care is challenging stuff. (Gods know that my doing yoga 6:30 am before I even have a cup of coffee has been difficult over the last few months, but it is good self-care so I am doing it.) Some self care doesn't look like self care to others because it means things like setting boundaries and doing other stuff that effects relationships and your time involving others. (That is also some really hard stuff to do. If you're struggling with it, don't give up. YOU are worth it!)

When a lot of people talk about self care on social media, they feature the cutesy things like taking a bubble bath, enjoying a glass of wine, or painting your toe nails (if you're into that stuff). There is a pretty strong push back against this image of self care because it is pretty incomplete and ableist. If you're someone who has problems with tachycardia, for example, that hot, relaxing bubble bath is going to be decidedly unpleasant pretty quickly. So, I am not going to promote those ideas, but I am going to encourage you to take some time to do what makes you happy.

We are all engaged in difficult times and dealing with life that just seems to become more challenging every day. It is pretty easy to get overwhelmed and just focus on what you need to do to survive. If you have people you are responsible for, it is even easier to just focus on what you need to do to meet those responsibilities and the bare minimum of what you need to do to survive. This is alright if you are in crisis mode but after a certain point, you are going to start suffering from burn out. That is just not good for you.

One of the things that helps with preventing burn out is proactive self care. It is like my doing my morning yoga routine. It helps keep my back problems under control, which lets me be more effective as a stay at home mom and a partner to my husband. Another thing, which those silly memes try to get into but fail pretty hard, is taking time to pamper yourself. This is not about being selfish in a bad way. This is about taking time to recharge your batteries, to rest and recover from all of that hard work you have been doing. Your self pampering is going to look different from mine (which is wonderful and good, everyone having different things that makes them happy is part of what makes the world a wonderful place). The goal, however, is the same.

Take some time to do something that brings you joy. This could be listening to some of your favorite music, having a nice cup of tea, or spending a blessed five minutes alone with out small children harrying you. (I confess, I will lock the bathroom door and pretend I'm not mom for a few minutes to give myself a breather.) Your goal is to seize that sweetness from life where you can find it. Some days it is going to be harder than others. Some days, it may just be that sweet feeling of release that comes when you kick off your shoes after a long day on your feet. Other days, it may be indulging in that bit of chocolate you have stashed inside the broccoli bag in the freezer so that your significant other doesn't eat it. (I don't do this, but another parent I know does it so that he can have his mini-Snickers bites when his wife isn't looking. To each their own!)

No matter what, take some time to do the things that help you feel more hopeful and happier about life. You matter too. Your happiness matters and your well being matters. So, I highly recommend taking sometime to attend to what gives you happiness and promotes your well being.

Have a wonderful day!

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