Thoughts, lessons, and theology from an eclectic witch from a varied background.

Monday, February 5, 2018

Random life update.

Gentle Reader,

Thank you for your patience with me. I'm adjusting to a medication change and it is making writing very hard. I get about two paragraphs, maybe a little more, and then I find myself on the verge of sobbing. I am still trying to figure out what is going on with that. I think this is a combination of my disability being in 'active' mode and medication side effects, but I'm not sure. It's been very hard to do much of anything, to be honest. My devotions are bare bones offerings and mumbled prayers as I struggle with feeling like everything I do is never going to be good enough. The beast of depression is riding me pretty hard right now. Hopefully, as I adjust to the medication change, things will stabilize soon and my mood will start to improve.

Until then, I will do my best to post when I have the energy for it. Thank you for your patience with me and for reading. (Oh, by the way, I misread the pattern for that fascinator and I'm remaking it correctly. I'll be posting some pictures and notes on the pattern when I get it done.)

Thank you.

Monday, January 29, 2018

Divination: Past Lesson Archives!

Dear Reader,

If you were interested in one of the previous series of Divination lessons, or the other lessons in things like Psychic Self Defense, I have them archived at > THIS < page. As new material is added, the archive page will be updated.

I am slowly working through the mass of text that I have piled up on this blog to back up everything. Some of the material here will also be reappearing in a book that I've been working on for about two years now. It's working title is The Psychic's Handbook. When I get the first draft completed, I will let you know, as well as how the editing process is going. Currently, I'm still working on finishing the tarot section and gathering materials for the runes section. Oddly, the tarot section is proving harder to work on when tarot is my primary divination tool. Capturing all the nuances is really challenging.

I will also be putting up a poll soon requesting some reader input on what you would like to see in the divination section. (I'm still learning the html for making a poll. Heck, I'm still learning html. My code is not pretty or fancy. But it is semi-functional. That counts as progress, right?)

Sunday, January 28, 2018

Godspousery Notes: You DON'T want to do that.

Dear Reader,

I fell about two weeks ago. I slipped off of the icy front steps (the bottom one, to be precise) and landed on the snow shovel. Luckily, I was wearing my heavy denim jacket and I did not break anything or get a bad cut. Because I landed on the thing on my back. This is relevant to this weekend's post.

I have a bad habit. Well, I have several, but the one that I'm specifically noting here is my bad habit to insist I can function at full capacity when I can not. Usually, this is an issue when I am sick. (And I get my proverbial chain jerked for it then, too.) I am stubborn and feel duty bound to do ALL THE THINGS. This gets to be a point of contention between myself, Beloved, and the gods. I generally don't win those arguments because they out number me and have logic on their side 9000% of the time.

This bad habit has been getting me into trouble of late. I'm pretty sure I bruised a rib in that fall. When I think about pushing myself too hard, Flame-Hair will nudge me in it. It is very uncomfortable. He has few qualms about making a point by making me very uncomfortable in pretty much all senses of the word. This weekend, I over did it with groceries. Beloved was awesome and understanding - even as he rolled his eyes and said "Well, dear, maybe you shouldn't have done that, eh?" when I said my side hurt from carrying stuff.

When I went to go take a nap post groceries, I was all ready to lay on my right side to fall asleep. And then Loki poked me. Nothing malicious, just a tiny poke. More like a light press, but I felt it none the less. So, I tried to nap on my left side, where I'm not injured. I wasn't successful because my side kept throbbing. As I lay there, trying to rest, Freyr sat beside me and gave me suggestions for what yoga stretches could help with that stiffness and aching. Somewhere, I'm sure Loki was whistling innocently and plotting his next poke to make me pay attention to my limits, or very exasperated and drinking some mead to ignore my stubborn insistence I was fine because the daily PAIN had gone away. Quite possibly both, now that I think about it.

Fast forward to today. I did my yoga in the morning and was thankful that the stretching helped. Later, I found my stomach was super upset. Who was it that said firmly "Soup. Soup fixes that.", why it was Loki. He sat himself at my kitchen table and insisted I needed soup and that the recipe I was considering was going to work better with zucchini noodles instead of butternut squash noodles. He was right on both counts, and looking for some soup for himself. So, we had some soup and I conceeded the point on the noodles. 

Somewhere in the last two weeks, I forget what day precisely it was, Freyja showed up for a visit. And not long after, Loki showed up in female guise. Which was confusing until I saw that trademark smirk. In both cases, there was a great deal of affection and many suggestions for how to manage the mundane things stressing me out. (And those suggestions like switching back to a mostly vegetarian diet for my stomach issues and trying to approach my frustrations with the kids as though they were students in my classroom have been amazingly helpful.) They both made clear that visits like that were going to happen in the future. I'm a little intimidated by it, but, at the same time, I'm happy for it because I had been feeling somewhat lonely of late for reasons I can't fully place. Their company was greatly appreciated. 

Tuesday, January 23, 2018

A few thoughts & book update.

Dear Reader,

I hope that you are not to vexed with me. Things have been rather busy over here. I am almost caught up on a ton of housework. I have been helping my sons with a great deal of homework. (I am proud to say that my youngest child can multiply by nine now with a lot of confidence. He got 100% on his last two assignments. Also, my eldest is doing very well in science. He received high marks on his last test, which I think is in no small part due to the fact they were discussing magnets and electricity. Two things he is fascinated by right now, right after the Titianic.)

As I have been doing my best to be functional as a mom and a housewife despite my having a lot of anxiety problems over the last few weeks, I realized that I had fallen behind in my prayer journaling. When I flipped through my prayer journal to yesterday's date, I saw a lot of empty pages. Instead of being upset with myself for it, I decided that I was going to fill in those pages too. Every empty moment that I would have spent on Facebook looking at silly cat memes, I was using either to fold laundry (half done as of this moment, tons more to go) or write in my prayer journal. Next thing I know, I had half the laundry done, as I mentioned, and almost a week's worth of entries written down.

It was something of a shock to me this morning when I opened it up to write down my prayers for this morning. It made me feel a bit hopeful about everything to realize that I can get caught up. I am now only three weeks behind in my journaling. I think I can get this up to the current date in a few days if I can sustain this rate of writing.

Speaking of writing, I am unfortunately going to have to postpone the release of my book of visions titled Drowning in Light. There were some major format problems in it that necessitated a complete rewrite. I am presently working on that. I think I may have it done sometime mid-spring. I apologize to anyone who was super excited and eagerly looking forward to it. As things improve, I will update you with new information.

Thank you so much for your patience.

Friday, January 19, 2018

Recommendations: Take a Mental Health day!

There are a lot of 'take care of yourself' memes out there. Usually, they include things like take a bubble bath, treat yourself to your favorite coffee drink, and stuff that requires spending money. If your budget is tight, it's hard to do those things. Most of us are trying to burn the proverbial candle at both ends, which contributes to burn out on pretty much all levels. Exhaustion leads to depression, which just makes you feel like life isn't worth the effort. To prevent this, you need to take care of your mental health as well as your physical health.

If you can't take a full day out of your week to rest and recover from the effort of the week. That's ok, at least try to squeeze an hour of time out just for you. No work, no social engagements. Just taking some time for you to rest. Maybe take a nap. Maybe knit something. Or just watch some program that you enjoy as you put your feet up and drink a hot chocolate. It is vital to tend to your mental health for you to be healthy in other areas of your life.

Now, I understand that this is very difficult to do. We are socialized to say that we must be productive all the time in order to be considered valuable members of society. This is not correct. This is actually a great and horrible lie. Our value does not lay in what we can produce or how many people we can please. We are valuable just as we are. It's a hard lesson to learn. I personally struggle with it a lot as I am disabled and it makes it really hard to look in the mirror and say I'm still a worthwhile person because I'm not out earning a paycheck.

The gods, however, don't care about your bank account or just how many people you make happy on a given day. They care about YOU in all your aspects, phases, and moods. You are valuable to them for reasons we can't begin to fathom, among them is that intrinsic value you have for just being yourself. They'd want you to take care of yourself because you are important. You deserve love, tenderness, and caring for your needs.

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

Herbalism, Tools, & Treasures: Rose Quartz

One of my favorite stones in the whole world is Rose Quartz. In the picture to the right is the chunk that is the size of my hand that I keep on my altar with my most used rosary laying upon it. I ascribe to the concept that crystals can impart energy into objects. After all, we use them as batteries in watches.  Rose Quartz is a stone associated with love, kindness, and health self-esteem. It only stands to reason that I am drawn to this stone, as these are traits I have been working hard to cultivate in myself for many years.

I believe that Rose Quartz is a stone that many would benefit from having in their lives. Apart from its beauty, it seems to lend a calming influence on the area it is located in. It is also a stone that is safe for pretty much everything, unlike the fancy salt lamps that can be toxic to pets. Because it is in the same family as Granite, Quartz is a very strong stone that can withstand a considerable amount of heat. Thus, if you can find a Rose Quartz candle holder, you can get the same area effect of a salt lamp with out the risk of your pets licking it and getting very sick when it is not in use.

Some use Rose Quart to make a gem elixir. I am hesitant to consider using gem elixirs because there are many water soluble stones that are very toxic. Rose Quartz, however, is one of the stones I would use to make a gem elixir because it will not dissolve into the water or alcohol. Gem elixirs operate on a homeopathic principle that the gem's energetic signature resonates with the water and is imparted into it through exposure. This can then be added to consumable products (i.e. beverages or food) so that the person using it can have more readily accessible use of the gem's energy. In theory, it sounds great. In practice, I have seen inconclusive results as to how effective it would be.

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Pagan Parenting: Ritual with Children.

Left to right: Snuggle bug, me, Cuddle Bear. Pic from 11/?/16
I have two very busy boys. They get into everything. When they're not getting into things to see what it is and how it works, they are trying to add to things. The altar has become a place of fascination for my eldest as he is developing a devotional relationship with Zeus. We have a clay monster that Cuddle Bear made which lives on the altar now because it belongs to the gods. This was his first decision after he brought it home and showed it to me. The youngest, Snuggle Bug,  regularly talks to M├íni.

High ritual just doesn't happen around here. Instead, we have small things we do like write notes to the gods in special notebooks. We give them gifts and share things with them. (The favorite toy to share with the gods are matchbox cars.) We tell the old stories and try to observe the holidays. Sometimes, ritual is just habitual things you do together. And that is ok.