Following the Goddess

I am a devotee of the Goddess. She has appeared to me variously as:

• Diana, chaste and fierce Huntress, maiden of the waxing moon
• Morrigan, sensual and savage War-Queen, bringer of death and rebirth
• Great Mother, still, quiet, and filled with boundless love for all life

The Goddess appears in many, many more fashions. I am certain that I shall have encounters with those faces as my years walking the earth wax long. As I read of the writings of others who worship the Goddess, I find myself yearning to read more that is in accordance with what I have experienced.

In my experiences with Diana, I have seen the raw power of nature flowing freely from her. In her, I see not only the power of humanity's highest potential but this pulsing flow that pushes through the hearts of all living creatures. Diana is beautiful and not to be trifled with. She is not only present in the hunter but also in the hunted. She could be upheld as Queen of the Chase, though I suspect some would find that phrasing odd.

In my experiences with Morrigan, I have felt the maternal qualities of this ancient goddess. She has taken me in hand and thrust me forward through rites of passage, much like a midwife helping to birth a child. Morrigan is also terrifying in her wrath. I have felt only the echo of it, for it was directed at one who had brought me harm. For a moment, I pitied that man. Only for a moment, for Morrigan turned to me and asked me why I pitied one who came deserving into her grasp. The grip of the Great Crow is not only maternal and a source of steadying strength for her devotees. It is also the unerring reach of karmic backlash.

The Great Mother is both familiar and foreign to me. Her gentleness bewilders me. I find myself expecting the hardness of Morrigan. As I slowly move forward upon this path of learning, the Great Mother watches me with a bemused quality in her gaze. I come away from it feeling like a small child struggling to do something that looked so simple when the adult did it. I struggle with all of my grotesque issues with the concept of one being a mother to me. They seem to become even more enormous when I look at the Great Mother.

Thankfully, she is patient and has a healing touch. The wounds to my soul run deep but I know that I am healing. I know it is in part due to my own efforts but more could be said to be the result of divine grace.