Hello. Please allow me to introduce myself. I am Deborah, also known as Cydira, Argent Asling, and Brythwen Sinclair. As you may have gathered from the title of this blog, I am a practicing witch. To be more specific, I am a practicing Wiccan of a family tradition that goes back several generations. I am blessed with psychic ability and I have a knack for divination. Amongst the pagans I socialize with, I'm known as a seer and a Sybil.
It has taken me over fifteen years to sit down and write this. Scattered bits and pieces of my work can be found on websites such as MysticWicks and a few Yahoo groups. (I have another blog (here) that is focused more upon theological inquiries and general ramblings on the matter of life as a witch. Feel free to take a peek.) It has only been recently that I laid aside my fears and begun acting in full accord with the deepest urgings of my soul, including writing this.
Today marks the end of the second full week of my wearing a head covering in public. It is only fitting that I begin this project at the beginning of my wearing a veil or headscarf (which I'll explain in a bit). It is also quite appropriate that I have begun this project in close correspondence with Imbolc. For Imbolc has become something of a time for modern Wiccans to rededicate themselves to the Craft and to initiate others.
One may ask why I cover my hair, especially when some of the most famous liturgical texts of modern Wicca exhort us to be naked in our rites as a sign of our freedom. I cover my hair when in public not out of shame or some sense of modesty. Rather, as a sign of my obedience to my goddess. She has said to me that I am to veil myself as an outward sign to others that I am her chosen daughter and priestess.
Only family and a chosen few, those whom I know respect and love me, shall be permitted to see my tresses. When in the ritual circle, I will wear my hair free and unbound as a sign of my power. In keeping my hair hidden, I protect my power and ward off the envious eye of others, along with their potential ill wishes. Months ago, I had very long hair. It was almost unmanageably long. Acting upon a combination of spiritual prompting and old fashioned frustration with my hair, I had eighteen inches cut off.
Since then, the pull to veil myself has grown even stronger. I could no longer deny the urge when I read of another pagan who veils herself. It was an article that told me I truly could give myself permission to do this with out fear of scorn. Seeing another's success can be extremely empowering.
The last two weeks have been a learning process. The first thing I learned is that I do not own enough basic kerchiefs to use a clean one everyday. A bit of fabric manipulation is required or the purchase of more. I'm honestly not sure which is the better option. I also learned that I do so love the look of how Jewish women and Muslim women veil themselves. Thirdly, I learned that it is quite challenging to research European veiling traditions. And, finally, while I do enjoy the appearance of a wimple and veil, it is far too complicated for anything but a special occasion.
An enormous amount of the literature available discussing veils and head coverings in the Western world (after weeding out the strictly wedding oriented articles) focus heavily on modesty. As I mentioned earlier, it is not modesty that has me covering my hair. It is a direct word from my goddess. While others may get tattoos or piercings, I do not have that luxury. My skin can not take the ink for various medical reasons and piercings would be problematic because of my metal allergies.
Thus, I am directed to veil and dress in a certain manner. When I have the means, I will transition away from wearing slacks most of the time to wearing skirts and dresses. Why? Because I am exhorted to embrace my femininity and those garments help put me in touch with it. When I was young, I went for a period of time dressing in this manner (sans veil/head covering). I felt empowered in my female nature.
It was unfortunate that others verbally attacked me for this and drove me away from this genuine expression of my soul. I have learned a great deal in the two decades since then. Stargazer taught me something important for the time that she was in my life. If you don't love who you are, then you are being somebody else. Stargazer was an incredible woman who I am proud to say was like a sister to me and my best friend. I think if she saw me today with my bit of head covering and how at peace it makes me, she'd say that I was a great fool for denying myself for so long. And follow up with a laugh and say "Silly Deb."
It is that kind of warmth and loving support that I am hoping to cultivate through my writing here for other young Witches and Seekers. Many of us come to Witchcraft after a great deal of searching. It is possible to find it austere and imposing. At the same time, there is an incredible depth of unconditional love that is available to any who wish to engage in a relationship with the Lady, the great goddess of Wicca. It is my hope to help guide you in building that relationship by way of modeling my own road to wisdom. (Of which I have many a mile left to walk.)