Divination: Past Lesson Archives!

Dear Reader,

If you were interested in one of the previous series of Divination lessons, or the other lessons in things like Psychic Self Defense, I have them archived at > THIS < page. As new material is added, the archive page will be updated.

I am slowly working through the mass of text that I have piled up on this blog to back up everything. Some of the material here will also be reappearing in a book that I've been working on for about two years now. It's working title is The Psychic's Handbook. When I get the first draft completed, I will let you know, as well as how the editing process is going. Currently, I'm still working on finishing the tarot section and gathering materials for the runes section. Oddly, the tarot section is proving harder to work on when tarot is my primary divination tool. Capturing all the nuances is really challenging.

I will also be putting up a poll soon requesting some reader input on what you would like to see in the divination section. (I'm still learning the html for making a poll. Heck, I'm still learning html. My code is not pretty or fancy. But it is semi-functional. That counts as progress, right?)

♥

Godspousery Notes: You DON'T want to do that.

Dear Reader,

I fell about two weeks ago. I slipped off of the icy front steps (the bottom one, to be precise) and landed on the snow shovel. Luckily, I was wearing my heavy denim jacket and I did not break anything or get a bad cut. Because I landed on the thing on my back. This is relevant to this weekend's post.

I have a bad habit. Well, I have several, but the one that I'm specifically noting here is my bad habit to insist I can function at full capacity when I can not. Usually, this is an issue when I am sick. (And I get my proverbial chain jerked for it then, too.) I am stubborn and feel duty bound to do ALL THE THINGS. This gets to be a point of contention between myself, Beloved, and the gods. I generally don't win those arguments because they out number me and have logic on their side 9000% of the time.

This bad habit has been getting me into trouble of late. I'm pretty sure I bruised a rib in that fall. When I think about pushing myself too hard, Flame-Hair will nudge me in it. It is very uncomfortable. He has few qualms about making a point by making me very uncomfortable in pretty much all senses of the word. This weekend, I over did it with groceries. Beloved was awesome and understanding - even as he rolled his eyes and said "Well, dear, maybe you shouldn't have done that, eh?" when I said my side hurt from carrying stuff.

When I went to go take a nap post groceries, I was all ready to lay on my right side to fall asleep. And then Loki poked me. Nothing malicious, just a tiny poke. More like a light press, but I felt it none the less. So, I tried to nap on my left side, where I'm not injured. I wasn't successful because my side kept throbbing. As I lay there, trying to rest, Freyr sat beside me and gave me suggestions for what yoga stretches could help with that stiffness and aching. Somewhere, I'm sure Loki was whistling innocently and plotting his next poke to make me pay attention to my limits, or very exasperated and drinking some mead to ignore my stubborn insistence I was fine because the daily PAIN had gone away. Quite possibly both, now that I think about it.

Fast forward to today. I did my yoga in the morning and was thankful that the stretching helped. Later, I found my stomach was super upset. Who was it that said firmly "Soup. Soup fixes that.", why it was Loki. He sat himself at my kitchen table and insisted I needed soup and that the recipe I was considering was going to work better with zucchini noodles instead of butternut squash noodles. He was right on both counts, and looking for some soup for himself. So, we had some soup and I conceeded the point on the noodles. 

Somewhere in the last two weeks, I forget what day precisely it was, Freyja showed up for a visit. And not long after, Loki showed up in female guise. Which was confusing until I saw that trademark smirk. In both cases, there was a great deal of affection and many suggestions for how to manage the mundane things stressing me out. (And those suggestions like switching back to a mostly vegetarian diet for my stomach issues and trying to approach my frustrations with the kids as though they were students in my classroom have been amazingly helpful.) They both made clear that visits like that were going to happen in the future. I'm a little intimidated by it, but, at the same time, I'm happy for it because I had been feeling somewhat lonely of late for reasons I can't fully place. Their company was greatly appreciated. 

♥

A few thoughts & book update.

Dear Reader,

I hope that you are not to vexed with me. Things have been rather busy over here. I am almost caught up on a ton of housework. I have been helping my sons with a great deal of homework. (I am proud to say that my youngest child can multiply by nine now with a lot of confidence. He got 100% on his last two assignments. Also, my eldest is doing very well in science. He received high marks on his last test, which I think is in no small part due to the fact they were discussing magnets and electricity. Two things he is fascinated by right now, right after the Titianic.)

As I have been doing my best to be functional as a mom and a housewife despite my having a lot of anxiety problems over the last few weeks, I realized that I had fallen behind in my prayer journaling. When I flipped through my prayer journal to yesterday's date, I saw a lot of empty pages. Instead of being upset with myself for it, I decided that I was going to fill in those pages too. Every empty moment that I would have spent on Facebook looking at silly cat memes, I was using either to fold laundry (half done as of this moment, tons more to go) or write in my prayer journal. Next thing I know, I had half the laundry done, as I mentioned, and almost a week's worth of entries written down.

It was something of a shock to me this morning when I opened it up to write down my prayers for this morning. It made me feel a bit hopeful about everything to realize that I can get caught up. I am now only three weeks behind in my journaling. I think I can get this up to the current date in a few days if I can sustain this rate of writing.

Speaking of writing, I am unfortunately going to have to postpone the release of my book of visions titled Drowning in Light. There were some major format problems in it that necessitated a complete rewrite. I am presently working on that. I think I may have it done sometime mid-spring. I apologize to anyone who was super excited and eagerly looking forward to it. As things improve, I will update you with new information.

Thank you so much for your patience.

Recommendations: Take a Mental Health day!

There are a lot of 'take care of yourself' memes out there. Usually, they include things like take a bubble bath, treat yourself to your favorite coffee drink, and stuff that requires spending money. If your budget is tight, it's hard to do those things. Most of us are trying to burn the proverbial candle at both ends, which contributes to burn out on pretty much all levels. Exhaustion leads to depression, which just makes you feel like life isn't worth the effort. To prevent this, you need to take care of your mental health as well as your physical health.

If you can't take a full day out of your week to rest and recover from the effort of the week. That's ok, at least try to squeeze an hour of time out just for you. No work, no social engagements. Just taking some time for you to rest. Maybe take a nap. Maybe knit something. Or just watch some program that you enjoy as you put your feet up and drink a hot chocolate. It is vital to tend to your mental health for you to be healthy in other areas of your life.

Now, I understand that this is very difficult to do. We are socialized to say that we must be productive all the time in order to be considered valuable members of society. This is not correct. This is actually a great and horrible lie. Our value does not lay in what we can produce or how many people we can please. We are valuable just as we are. It's a hard lesson to learn. I personally struggle with it a lot as I am disabled and it makes it really hard to look in the mirror and say I'm still a worthwhile person because I'm not out earning a paycheck.

The gods, however, don't care about your bank account or just how many people you make happy on a given day. They care about YOU in all your aspects, phases, and moods. You are valuable to them for reasons we can't begin to fathom, among them is that intrinsic value you have for just being yourself. They'd want you to take care of yourself because you are important. You deserve love, tenderness, and caring for your needs.

♥

Herbalism, Tools, & Treasures: Rose Quartz

One of my favorite stones in the whole world is Rose Quartz. In the picture to the right is the chunk that is the size of my hand that I keep on my altar with my most used rosary laying upon it. I ascribe to the concept that crystals can impart energy into objects. After all, we use them as batteries in watches.  Rose Quartz is a stone associated with love, kindness, and health self-esteem. It only stands to reason that I am drawn to this stone, as these are traits I have been working hard to cultivate in myself for many years.

I believe that Rose Quartz is a stone that many would benefit from having in their lives. Apart from its beauty, it seems to lend a calming influence on the area it is located in. It is also a stone that is safe for pretty much everything, unlike the fancy salt lamps that can be toxic to pets. Because it is in the same family as Granite, Quartz is a very strong stone that can withstand a considerable amount of heat. Thus, if you can find a Rose Quartz candle holder, you can get the same area effect of a salt lamp with out the risk of your pets licking it and getting very sick when it is not in use.

Some use Rose Quart to make a gem elixir. I am hesitant to consider using gem elixirs because there are many water soluble stones that are very toxic. Rose Quartz, however, is one of the stones I would use to make a gem elixir because it will not dissolve into the water or alcohol. Gem elixirs operate on a homeopathic principle that the gem's energetic signature resonates with the water and is imparted into it through exposure. This can then be added to consumable products (i.e. beverages or food) so that the person using it can have more readily accessible use of the gem's energy. In theory, it sounds great. In practice, I have seen inconclusive results as to how effective it would be.

Pagan Parenting: Ritual with Children.

Left to right: Snuggle bug, me, Cuddle Bear. Pic from 11/?/16

I have two very busy boys. They get into everything. When they're not getting into things to see what it is and how it works, they are trying to add to things. The altar has become a place of fascination for my eldest as he is developing a devotional relationship with Zeus. We have a clay monster that Cuddle Bear made which lives on the altar now because it belongs to the gods. This was his first decision after he brought it home and showed it to me. The youngest, Snuggle Bug,  regularly talks to Máni.

High ritual just doesn't happen around here. Instead, we have small things we do like write notes to the gods in special notebooks. We give them gifts and share things with them. (The favorite toy to share with the gods are matchbox cars.) We tell the old stories and try to observe the holidays. Sometimes, ritual is just habitual things you do together. And that is ok.

Tips for choosing your first Tarot deck.

Everyone who practices cartomancy has their own favorite pack of cards and style of use. There are literally thousands of different styled decks on the market. A collector could go into serious debit because the price ranges into pretty high numbers. Because of the staggering array of what you could choose from, I'm narrowing my focus to tarot cards. Again, there is an astonishing variety, but we can narrow your options down into a more realistic set with a few steps.

The average price of a tarot deck is between $15 and $30 dollars. Sometimes, you may get lucky and find them at second hand stores for a $1.50. If cost is not an option, you can buy from pretty much any place you can find them with out much worry about funding your purchase. If you're like me, you need to spend within your budget. There are some really amazing decks out there with fantastic artwork that are not going to clean out your bank account. Shopping around by price, you can still find some great stuff.

That said, choosing your deck based on artwork is a valid way to do it. If the artwork looks amazing to you and gives you all kinds of wonderful feels, and it is in your budget, snap that puppy up. If the artwork looks stunning but it is confusing, you have two options. One is to buy the really cool looking deck because it is really cool. This will lead you down the road of collecting cards, just to warn you. The other option is the buy the deck and try to work with it for a few months. It may be that the deck will get easier to handle as you get more experience with it.

(If anyone can help me learn the identity of this deck that I found a picture of on a free stock photography site years ago, I will owe you a big favor! I want to acquire it but have no idea where to start.)

If you're not so sure about choosing a deck based on artwork, start with the simplest and least expensive deck you can find. It will usually be some variation of the Rider-Waite deck. This is the basis of  most popular tarot decks. In fact, if you can find a reprint of the Rider-Waite deck, it is an excellent deck to start with. The trick is to find one that comes with a good booklet on the standard meanings. While you could go out and buy a book on tarot reading, the booklets and some practice can get just about anyone started on doing tarot readings as a hobby.

A proposal: Winter Carinval

Dear Reader,

I have a modest proposal for my good friends in the Filianic and Déanic communities, as well as they who follow similar belief systems based upon these faiths. Just as there are many in the Christian community who celebrate the period between Nativity and Lent as a time of great feasting and joyous behavior, I propose that a similar celebration be embraced. Please consider my reasoning for this proposal.

1. It is during this period that the Daughter is most present in the World. She wears the mantle of Princess of the World as her primary role at this time. According to the holy writ, she moves through the World freely. This is a thing that should be celebrated as it is a miracle most holy and joyous.

2. The winter stores may be getting depleted in our households. While we have greater access to things by way of grocery stores than out ancestors did, there are still special things we put buy or make in winter like holiday cookies that we should enjoy before they are out of season. (As my Beloved husband says, this is the time to enjoy the eggnog while it lasts.) Why not do so with great happiness and gratitude for it?

3. The time for turning expectations upside down is traditionally during this 'season'. Perhaps the embrace of New Year's Resolutions is a minor manifestation, where we are expecting ourselves to break out of established habits. And perhaps we could include an expectation for greater joy in our lives when all the world seems to encourage us to believe that joy is in small quantity. We have the wonderful ability to manufacture situations where we may be joyful. It is a tiny way to put the world's expectations of doom and gloom on their head, is it not?

4. It is also a wonderful way to fortify our spirits in preparation for the stern season of Moura and the times of restriction that come with it. While we may look forward to the Resurrection of the Daughter with great hope, should we not also celebrate the life of Her and that holy presence in the world beyond the mysteries of Nativity?

Godspousery Notes: Cat's Cradle

It has been a long week. It has been a long two weeks, to be honest. I'm struggling to make things happen. I thought that today was going to be the day I got caught up on stuff. Somehow, I spent most of my day making doll clothes and wandering through the apartment in the way I do when I'm over tired but feel I must do something.

I sit here attempting to think of something to say. Loki is sitting in the other chair where I usually work on mending and such, playing cat's cradle. How he is accomplishing it with only two hands, I have no idea. But he said something earlier that stuck in my mind. "You were feeling sad, anxious, and like everything you did was doomed for failure. Now the doll has little pantalettes and half a sweater. And you have enough yarn left to make booties, mittens, and a hat. That's not failure. And you got to play with a doll for a little bit and not feel quite so bad. Not too bad for a Saturday, is it?"

I wound up taking a nap earlier and Freyr cuddled me as Beloved was in the kitchen washing dishes and minding the children. Freyr said to me, "You're allowed to rest, you know. This is how you keep healthy. Self care is as much a part of the work as finishing your novels and keeping house."

It's hard because I struggle with self care. I was taught very young that I was not a priority and therefore my self care was not a priority or it was such a low one that it barely registered. I find myself torn between guilt because I could have gotten so much done today. And tempted to head to bed early because I was up early. Loki's said something to the effect that I have myself so twisted up that he has a hard time figuring it out and I need to get that unwound. I suppose that massive guilt complex over self care may be part of what he was talking about.

Prayer habits are hard.

Dear gentle Reader,

My good and faithful friend, I must be honest with you. Prayer is very hard to do when you are not well. Depression lies and tells me that all is hopeless. Anxiety tells me that if I don't pray in the correct fashion, the gods will be offended and my luck will turn worse. Exhaustion and brain fog makes it hard to remember to write in my prayer journals or bide my beads. It's just very hard to pray these days.

Which makes it all the more important to at least try. Sometimes, what I manage is a line or two in one of my prayer journals. Other times, I just hold my prayer beads and silently as the gods to just help me make it through the day and help me meet my responsibilities. My most common prayer of late is simply "Please help me." I cast it out to any of the household gods that may hear me with great desperation at times. Attempting to sleep when I'm struggling with panic and such, I tend to ask Freyr and Loki to help me. That's all I ask for, help. Sometimes that help comes by way of feeling their presence at my side. Sometimes that help comes by way of them talking me through a grounding exercise or reminding me to take a medication I forgot.

The hardest thing right now in my prayer life is remembering that I can take time to pray and it is ok. It is a form of self care that I struggle with, because I'm not very good at self care. Interestingly enough, the form of 'active' prayer that I have been strongly encouraged to engage in from the gods are all self care activities. Like Freyr asking me to spend some time with him doing exercise and yoga (he especially enjoys taking walks with me when the weather is nice) or Loki telling me I should eat good healthy food that I enjoy and take showers when I need them.

Godspousery means there is a more direct relationship, even when depression makes me feel isolated from them. Thus, they make a point of things like very strongly encouraging me to take a nap when I have a migrane coming on or will offer encouragement when I am doing something difficult. And that exchange is kinda what prayer is about. It's a discussion between you and the gods. Sometimes, that discussion is "Hey, it's time to take your medication and go to bed" if you're open to it. 

Disgruntled witch is disgruntled.

Dear Reader,

I'm not sure what to write at the moment. Life is pretty much the same as it was yesterday. My boys are bouncing off the walls with excitement because they have a snow day tomorrow. I'm recovering from having a migraine this morning. I am pretty sure that the migraine worked pretty well to destroy any plans I had in the works for today's posting.

I honestly can not say my heart is in writing today's post. I feel rather miserable. The cold weather has been making my arthritis act up to the point that my back was just nothing but pain last night and today it is my knees giving me trouble. It only exaggerates the aches and such that come with the malaise of depression. I also am recovering from spraining my wrist yesterday when I slipped on some ice. It makes working on what is a very simple crochet pattern rather difficult.

Today has been a challenging day. I try to remember to write in my prayer journal and find three things to be thankful for. Right now, I am thankful that today is almost done, that I have the ability to make this post, and your readership. I hope tomorrow will be a better day.

May Dea's love be ever upon you. And the gods who favor you always smile upon you.

♥

Veiling, Vintage Style.

Hello dear Reader,

As the weather has been inclement, my most frequent form of head covering has been a ski hat. Now, ski hats are nice and warm. Don't think I dislike that. But I am not the biggest fan of how they look. So, I have been looking at vintage crochet and knitting patterns for hats. It has been fun and confusing all at the same time. Some of these things I honestly have no idea how these ladies kept them on their heads.

I decided that I am going to make a bunch and share the results here. This week, I am going to make the Lacy Fascinator Pattern #1826. I'll post a picture of myself wearing the end result when I get it finished with my comments on the pattern and the process. As well as what yarn I used and any adaptations I made to it.

It happens to me too.

Gentle Reader,

I know that many of your associates or even yourself have suffered indignities because of the choice to be veiled. Given the rise of acceptance for the attitudes of xenophobia, Islamophobia, and fear of anything that looks remotely Arab through those highly skewed viewpoints, there has been a sharp uptick in incidents where people who choose to be veiled are harassed. Sometimes it is the store manager following you around the store as you make your purchases. Sometimes it is the people you walk by at the park muttering something vile and degrading. There's even been incidents where someone has attempted to pull a veil off of a person's head because of their frothing hatred of anything different.

I just want to say that you are not alone. I have had people mutter behind me at the grocery store that I should go back to where I came from. (Honestly, I have been tempted to turn around and say, "I'll be doing that as soon as I get my ham and the rest of my groceries. I live right around the corner." I don't because I don't want there to be a scene.)  I have had people tell me that I was oppressing myself in wearing my veil (which makes absolutely no sense to me). I have also had people move well within my personal space and try to loom over me.

The incident that bothered me so much that it was hard to function for the rest of the day happened yesterday afternoon. I was at the grocery store. I was wearing a sparkly pashmina in a headrail style. Honestly, with how cold it has been, I was thinking about a face veiling style just to be warmer. Looking back, I sadly say that I am glad I didn't.

As I was on my way into the grocery store, a group of young adults (I think they were around 20 and there was five of them.) said "Let's mess with the weird lady in front of us." I would have paid it no mind except for the fact that I was literally the only person in front of them at that time. They followed me around the store for a bit. I managed to dodge them towards the back of the store.

When I finished my shopping and I came out to my car, I found that it was half surrounded by shopping carts. This was not some one just left their cart in the parking lot rather than move it to the cart corral or the front doors because it was so cold it made my feet look tropically warm. It was clear they were placed there deliberately. I suspect the car would have been completely surrounded if they had not been interrupted by someone. It was very upsetting for me. I was having a hard time feeling safe after they stalked me through half the store. Coming out to find that someone deliberately attempted to block my car in with shopping carts was distressing.

I honestly don't know what would have happened if I came out while they were playing their 'prank'. I genuinely felt like my safety was at risk when they were following me. But because I didn't get a good look at them, I couldn't go to staff at the store and inform them that I was being harassed and request the store manager resolve the problem. I feel like if I was wearing a more 'Islamic' style of veil, the threat of physical danger to my person would have been greater. This causes me deep grief and anger.

It also has me feeling like I should carry a roll of quarters in my pocket like I did ages ago when I was dealing with the potential threat of being jumped on a semi-regular basis. Because throwing a punch is more effective with more mass behind it. Just remember, keep your thumb on the outside of the fist. Sensei said if it was on the inside, you'd break your thumb. And keep your hand square with your wrist, so you don't break that either.