I frequently question if I am good enough. I have some major anxiety issues. Loki (and others) remind me that it doesn't matter what my anxiety tells me. I just have to be myself and do what I know is right. I don't have to be some one else's idea of a priestess of Déa. I don't have to be some one else's idea of a godspouse to Loki and Freyr. I don't have to fit the suburbanite mold of what a good housewife and mother looks like. I don't have to fit the toxic mold that my parents did their best to push on to me as I was growing up.
I just have to be myself. I'm allowed to cry when I am hurt and I don't need to fear someone hurting me for it. I'm allowed to feel insecure and not have to justify my feelings to some inquisitor who believes that I have no reason to feel that way. I am allowed to have my faith with out having to hide it or worry that someone is going to report me to child protective services because I'm not a Christian (a threat that a relative had made before I had kids during a family "intervention".) or because I have mental illnesses that disable me. I am allowed to be who I am in my flawed, struggling way. I don't have to be perfect.
It all cycles back to "Everything's broken, nothing's perfect."And that is liberating. The mental chains of feeling like I have to be perfect at everything to prove my humanity are snapped apart with that statement about the world. It completely changes my paradigm with the world and gets a little disorienting at times. But, this is what World-Breaker does. And this is one of the reasons why I love him.
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