When I don't feel well, I tend to be cranky and will bicker with people in my life. I try not to do it, but the words just pop out of my mouth before I can stop them. For a while, I argued with Freyr. He steadfastly had told me from the time of the summer solstice on that we were married. I argued that there had been no formal rite and that it couldn't be the case. It was a peevish argument, with Freyr generally sighing in exasperation when it happened. Other deities supported Freyr's argument, but I was bullheaded and insisted I was right. (Yes, I tend to have a habit of getting like this. I try not to but it happens from time to time.)
Then about a week ago, in the dreamscape, Freyr told me to come with him. He said that he had wanted to show me something. So, I followed him into a room that was cozy and just had all the perfect things that made it somewhere I would love to go and just relax away from the world. Standing in the center of that room, there was a dress form. On it was the gown that I had dreamed of wearing for my wedding to Beloved. A blood red gown in a medieval style with gold bands of embroidery at the neckline and on the sleeves, it really was a striking sight. There was a girdle of gold with garnets on it. The entire thing just about glowed in the light of the room. I felt a pang of regret for not having a gown like that for my wedding to Beloved and that was when Freyr said, "You need to get dressed."
I was a bit confused. He motioned towards the gown and I just stood there running my hand over the fabric. It was so, so soft. And the embroidery, it was so detailed that I just kept getting lost in the pattern of the vines and leaves. He smiled and removed the girdle. As he set it aside, I realized that I was supposed to actually wear the gown. I looked down at myself and discovered that my jeans and t-shirt turned into a leine that reached my ankles and stockings that were also that vivid red. As he helped me into the gown, I wanted to ask him what was going on but he looked so solemn that I didn't dare to. He handed me the girdle and I fastened it about my waist.
When I looked up, I saw that he was no longer in the jeans and flannel shirt of earlier. Instead, he was dressed in clothes of the same period as my gown, but of the Nordic styles rather than that of the English. He held out his hand. I took it and we walked out a set of french doors and into a garden. The whole garden was in bloom. Things that bloomed in different seasons were blooming alongside each other. The air was fragrant and everything was dazzlingly beautiful. I wanted to say something about how nice it was when he placed a finger over my lips.
We came to a little bridge over a stream. As we crossed it, I saw a gathering of people ahead of us. I thought it was some sort of party. When we were close enough to see what was going on, I found myself looking at the assembled body of the Aesir and the Vanir. I saw my ancestors with them and my spirit allies. Stargazer was there and beaming with delight. I turned to ask Freyr was was going on when Frigga and Freyja came forward, Frigga standing on the left with the Aesir and Freyja standing on the right with the Vanir.
When they both raised their hands high, I realized that they were each holding a spindle and the other was holding the end of the thread wound on it. Everything made sense in that moment. Freyr turned to me and asked me to walk with him over the threshold. I started to tear up but I nodded yes. I was about to step forward when he told me to wait a moment. Then he set a garland of flowers on my head. We walked beneath the threads holding hands and in pace with each other. The whole company assembled cheered and applauded. Freyr embraced me and whispered, "Three times wedded. Third time's the charm. You'll remember this time."
I just held him and stared around myself with amazement. There was a feast afterwards but I only remember that it happened, nothing more. I know some people would say that dreams are wishes but this was something more. When I can think of that dress I yearned to wear and not feel heartbreak over it, I know it was true.
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